Richard was troubled. He’d fallen into a dark place and, like a child stranded at the bottom of a well, knew not how to save himself. He clawed in vain at the walls of his prison and wept openly when he realized how utterly lost and desolate he was. Until moments ago, his soul had been, for the most part, smooth and clear. Like any man his age, there were a few blemishes. He consoled himself with the belief that no one could live a completely blemish-free life.

A lie to his father about who’d broken a window here. A neglected dinner appointment there. Over time, Richard had built up more than a few dark acts on the rap sheet of his conscience, but they were nothing compared with what had happened. In a moment of passion, he’d opened his palette to a darkness so consuming that he’d lost his sense of right and wrong. In a moment, his conscience was completely squelched by his thirst for vengeance.

He’d reached out and ended the life of another. He’d thought himself God and taken a life as his own. Even as the last flicker of life had begun to fade in the other, he’d tried to take it back. Just as Richard had willed the man dead, he tried to will him back to life. His memories flashed back to a childhood friend’s broken arm and how he’d tried to will it back to some semblance of whole.

“It’ll be OK. Just don’t tell your Mom.”

In the here and now he had done more than just harm another, though. He’d wholly and completely destroyed them. Consumed their body with fire and ended its ability to go on living. As a last act of selflessness he’d opened himself. Trying to take back the act and unwittingly opening his own body as a host for the other’s cast aside soul.

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Richard went home and sat in his living room. It was only 6 o’clock, but he had nowhere to go and nothing to do. He thought for a minute about turning on the TV. He almost made it as far as to pick up the remote, but deep down he didn’t want to watch specials about the horrors of humanity tonight. He was already inside his own little horror show, he didn’t need speculating journalists to seed his already tormented imagination.

No, what Richard needed to finish today was a drink.

A lot of drinks.

He carefully removed his car keys from his key ring and tossed them on the bed. Then he pulled on a heavier coat to fight the cold that was sure to come later that night and walked the three blocks to the bus stop in front of the supermarket. Richard was going to get wasted. He knew this, and he was sure his car would thank him for this much foresight.

His head, knowing a heavy hangover was more than a sure thing, wouldn’t be so lucky.

Richard’s usual bar was only a few bus stops down, sharing a parking lot with a dog groomer, a hair salon, a FedEx Express – what a stupid name. FedEx is already short for express! – and an Americanized-Mexican restaurant that served fries with its tacos. It was an odd assortment of businesses, but Richard knew the bar was of fair quality. Read the rest of this story »

IV

Richard ignored the alarm clock and laid, staring at the ceiling. His eyes bored a hole that was filled in with static if he stared too long without blinking. He’d wink his eyes and re-wet the lens, then stare again for a few minutes or so. To his disappointment, though, this was a staring contest he would lose every time.

His mind drifted again to the whining alarm clock on the night stand and, once again, he forced his mind to ignore it, refocusing his energy and concentration on the ceiling. Not only was he haunted by the dream that wasn’t a dream, he really didn’t want to give that presentation this afternoon.

Mary had already gotten up. Their typical routine was, well, routine. If Mary was up before her alarm went off (as per the usual), they’d have time for a quickie before she hopped in the shower. Richard would go back to sleep while she went through her morning ritual. Then, dressed and freshly showered, she’d climb back into bed and nap for another 15-20 minutes, usually remembering to reset her alarm beforehand.

While he never understood the point of the post-shower nap, Richard welcomed the company. He wasn’t ready to be alone with his thoughts, not yet. Unfortunately, Mary had gotten up for her second alarm and set out for the day. Since he didn’t have to get an early start today, Richard had expected to snag an extra hour of shuteye before heading in to work.

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